Category Archives: Uncategorized

New beginning…..sorta

Well, I have finally gotten sick, absolutely SICK, of my comp acting up for the reason of a lack of memory, so, I resorted to a long-fought-against idea: TOTAL SYSTEM RECOVERY (dum dum DUMMMM!).

In other words, for those who may have HP pavilions, its that thing that you initiate by pressing F10 at the very beginning of the startup. Its meant to clear everything that you may have put on the comp and restore it to the beauty that was present when you first bought the PC.

And right now, I’m enjoying a newly restored comp, with all features present and accounted for, something that i can’t say for the previous state of the computer. Just redownloaded RealPlayer, Windowsmedia, Winamp, and Quicktime, and I’m enjoying every possible minute of this!

Of course, there’s the fact that I didn’t save most of the personal pics on the Internet, something which I should’ve done before the recovery (DOH!). But fortunately, I have saved a couple of them on my website.

You guys just don’t know how exuberant I am! Yes yes yes!!!

OK, back to listening to online radio…

hey again

watching: “Tutenstein” with my older nephew
reading: “The Wild” by Whitley Strieber (i hope they can make a movie out of the book)

Hi again, I’m back.

Well, what’s been going on with me? How do I round it off…

1) Just got news that my sis is returning to Germany (within a matter of weeks) for a while, so it seems that her Iraq ordeal is finally coming to a gradual, yet long-awaited close. And I would be glad, except for two things: a) my nephews aren’t going back to Germany to stay with their mother, because b) she will be coming back later to get stationed at Ft. Benning with the kids and her ass of a “husband” (heh, “baby-daddy” is more like it to describe him). She wants to be back for my graduation in May.

2) My collegiate future (as far as the second semester of 12th grade is concerned) is STILL in debate. A family friend of Mom’s is helping us work it out before the 16th, which is the deadline given to us by the (infernal) Board of Ed. of Houston County. So in the meantime, since I only have 3 classes now (Bible [ick], Language Arts, and Advanced Math), I’m now whiling the time after 10:30 AM away doing stuff for the school/church admin, like copying sermon tapes and printing T&O envelopes. I have to do all this until I’m actually (hopefully) admitted to a college by the 16th.

3) I’m still smarting from the disappearance of my Windows Media Player. I can’t play any asx or wma files, not even on Real Player, not even on Warez, not even on frickin Winamp!!! Damnit! Now I’m attributing it to the virus that I’m sure are plaguing the hard drive to its core. What do you guys think?

4) I’m awaiting my b-day on the 5th of next month, when I finally turn legal, lol. Man, I can’t wait to kiss childhood goodbye…

Also, I’m awaiting the premiere of “American Dragon: Jake Long” from the creators of Kim Possible. Now, I wouldn’t usually pay any attention whatsoever to Disney Channel, or anything Disney related. But American Dragon seems different from the other shit that they put on Disney Channel (which my nephew watches avidly, much to my chagrin). For one, its dealing with shapeshifting, a favored subject of discussion for me, personally. Plus, its dealing with China and Sino-related stuff, and I am fond of that, since the social sciences have ALWAYS won my interest and attention, so for the KP creators and animators to bring Chinese subject matter into the limelight is admirable, something that I DEFINATELY cannot say for anything else that is shown on Disney Channel.

Anyone else going to watch it for at least 5 minutes when it premieres on the 17th?

Religious Fundamentalism

In the past several years, the world has witnessed the rise of religious fundamentalism, which, in essence, is the religiously conservative interpretation of government, law, ethics, and society in general.

Within the same timelength, we have eyed, with horror, the rise of terrorism and terrorist actions, most of which have been carried out, propogated, or sponsored (covertly or openly) by organizations and/or nations which maintain, for more or less, a religiously fundamentalist agenda or platform.

Religious fundamentalism has become prominent and popular in areas or countries where a great deal of the population is either perpetually poor or dispossessed by either one or all of that particular area’s or nation’s dominating institutions. To such a people, religious fundamentalism serves as a channel through which they can vent their frustration against these dominating institutions or conditions.

What are these institutions or conditions?

Poverty; government; inflation; disease; famine; dearth of natural or processed resources; oppression of political, ethnic, or religious dissent by gendarmaric (police) or military means; war; corruption; ethnic, lingual, political, or religious exclusion and maltreatment; climate; the list goes on.

However, when a people collectively lean themselves upon religious fundamentalism as the foundation of their individual lives, their neighbors DO have a right to fear.

From how I see it, terrorism is a thing of concern, no matter for what cause it may be adopted; but in the present reality, we need to realize that religious fundamentalism is, itself, the monster which every judicially-minded, democratic, people-centered society must fear.

What religious fundamentalism encourages is (1) the manipulation of a nation’s rule of law or a society’s general cultural practices through religious means or outlooks, and calls for (2) the accomplishment of such by whatever means possible, if not necessary.

Furthermore, it espouses (3) a variant degree of intolerance against other beliefs which may not be sponsored by that particular religion or spirituality, as well as those who may hold such beliefs, and thus encourages (4) the adherents of that particular religion to “convert the infidels”, again, by whatever means possible.

Now to me, such an agenda is not even worthy of consideration, as I do not hold the beliefs of Christianity as my own anymore. But when the means to accomplish this agenda are taken too far, that is what we know now as but a simple “terroristic manifestation of the religious fundamentalist agenda”.

We’ve seen such manifestations many, many times within the last 20 years.

Both WTC bombings, the bombings of the American embassies in both Nairobi and Dar es Salaam, the murder of Theo Van Gogh, the bombings in Bali, the suicide attacks in Israel, Saudi Arabia, Turkey, Germany, Italy, Philippines, Algeria, and so on.

But it doesn’t just stop with Islam.

We’ve also seen the Oklahoma City bombings, the Georgia abortion clinic bombings, the lynchings of Afro-Diasporian Americans since the 19th century (especially by the accursed KKK), the Tokyo subway gas attacks by the Aum Shinrikyo, Russian pogroms against Jewish Eastern-Europeans (both in the Czarist days and again in post-Soviet Yeltsin/Putin-era Russia), and countless other manifestations of religious fundamentalism.

So we’ve seen all of this within the last several years. Does this prove that religious fundamentalism is a destructive force, a monster which, once unleashed, can whip out heavy doses of destruction, loss of life, and misery? It most certainly does.

This is why I fear the religious fundamentalist movement in the United States. This particular movement wants change of the political system (just as much as everyone else does, as the politics of this nation have indeed, become, stagnant and corrupt), but for them, this change should convert the nations laws and ethics to the aforementioned platform of the religious right. And to accomplish such, or to show displeasure over this nation’s laws or standards, Christian fundamentalists have resorted to more uncivil ways to make their point known, and not in an entirely-unsimilar fashion as their Muslim counterparts in the Muslim world.

And now, I’m actually trying to look at the current religious situation from the eyes of George W. Bush, who has got to be one of the most disliked heads of state of current times, at least, on the international level.

As Dubya has made it clear that his broadest and most prominent base of support is the American “moral majority”, and as personally assertive as he has displayed himself before the world since he took office in January of 2001, he still has to bend over backwards in order to satisfy the entirety of the moral majority itself. He, in reality, is NOT as far to the right as it may initially seem, since within the “moral majority”, you have as much a specturm of thought and conscience as you’ll find within the entirety of American politics. I mean, I may be third party/independent as far as the United States is concerned, but take my word for it: Dubya is NO Alan Keyes.

And he may have to watch his back as well, since the same group that brought him up can take him down, and some who are so far right within the moral majority that they cannot even reconcile their own convictions with Bush (who should’ve been their knight in shining armor) could wind up taking him out, LITERALLY.

Thus, I may not care at all for him, but I am certain that Bush isn’t THAT conservative, as he is fighting terrorism and religious fundamentalism in other countries (and wasting American lives and money in the process). If he was actually THAT conservative, then America would turn into a Christian Iran or Saudi Arabia (something that heaven forbid ever happens to the United States).

But I hope that Dubya does realize that religious fundamentalism is the enemy that he should be fighting, both abroad and at home, even with his own initial electoral support.

Religious fundamentalism (and its sick idea of politics) is the biggest threat to the preservation and transcience of basic human rights, as is ethnocentrism, one-party/one-man dictatorship, and/or anything else that may advance the belief that only one designated way is the only way, and should be solidified as such.

Religious fundamentalism IS the danger.

Ethics and Morals

A thing that I have noticed in America, especially with the conservative, fundamentalist right, is a frequent tendency to refer to “morals” whenever they offer an explanation of the rightist agenda. How have they used it?

To the right (and maybe to the right-leaning centrists), “morals” or “morality” is the standard of human behavior, which dictate that humanity should not do this or that or the other, lest humanity incur the wrath of God, which will pour out upon it’s head in the form of natural disaster or plague, among the many possible manifestations of God’s anger.

Well, I see their point….sort of.

People DO have (1) a responsibility to follow a certain standard in their behavior (ESPECIALLY around other people) and not to force their own ways upon others at their expense, (2) a right to be respected as normal human beings BY other human beings and to enforce the legitimacy of that right, and (3) a reason to not bend to the breaking point of their own personal sovereignty in order to satisfy someone else.

However, natural disasters, plagues, famines, and all of these supposed manifestations of divine pissed-off-ness have as much chance to happen to the most “holified” and “sanctified” nation tomorrow as the “sinful” one next door.

Yet, thats not the point of this discourse.

What IS the point is the fact that the fundamentalist right has basically confused “morals” with “ethics”.

Morals are, in fact, how the average person is supposed to relate to his or her personal divinity, be it God, Christ, Allah, the orishas, or whoever they may consider as their deity.

Ethics are the standards of behavior which are set, officially or not, in the stone of any society, as far as relating to people (depending upon each person’s societal status) is concerned.

So consider this: a Christian or Muslim guy becomes, over time, a habitual drunkard. And yet, he continues to serve as a deacon or imam.

Morals would say: “You have shamed yourself before God/Allah (and God/Allah before the believers), so repent or go to hell.”

Ethics would say: “You’re shaming your office as a deacon or imam, so clean up your act or resign/risk being demoted.”

Very much often, morals and ethics are interchangeable in application or situation, so alot of times, depending upon the matter or how/when/why/where/who/what it is dealt with, morals and ethics can go hand in hand.

If you violate morals, then yes, its reasonable and sound to question the ethics of the person in question. And it can work vice versa as well.

However, don’t take it as morals and ethics being unitary (that is, one and the same), for there is a distinct and recognizable difference, as already mentioned.

Morality is how you relate to your personal ultimate higher power (PUHP), and that is, ultimately, a personal issue. Ethics is how you relate with others, depending upon your status or profession within the world, and that, unlike morals, is something that is, ultimately, everyone’s issue.

So I ask the religious right to recoginze the difference between ethics and morals, and to maintain their stances and platforms upon such a difference of definitions. In other words, the right shouldn’t get it twisted.

But of course, I am not stipulating that morals can ever possibly exist apart from or completely sans the ethics, or vice versa. As all humans have some form of relationship with their PUHP, no matter how distant or close it may be, as we all have some sort of relationship with humanity in general, it makes sense that morals and ethics overlap frequently and indiscriminately, as both of them involve us, humanity, either on a personal or pluralistic level, but still involve the individual nonetheless.

What I AM saying, however, is that there IS a difference between morality and ethicality. We should all recognize that, especially those of us who may confuse the two as being one.

My December

Well, its Christmas Eve, and we are spending it rearranging the living room (in order to make room for the Christmas tree, which I am not really wild about) and cleaning up a whole lot of gathered dust. There’s not much to talk about or write about anymore, and IM is not a thing that I’m wild about anymore.

A whole lot has changed through the course of this year, a whole lot. As far as being online is concerned, there are few constants that have remained from last Christmas, among them being my fascination with anthro/furry art and therianthropy, my love for politics and foreign news, and my tendency to voice my conscience on different subjects.

But there have been a lot of new things that I have worn out quickly over the past 12 months. Internet at home, Instant Messaging, DeviantArt, LiveJournal, flash cartoons (well, then again, I return to those time and time again, lol), all of that, I’ve just worn them all out, or at least worn myself out from utilizing them so much. And now I only submit a work to DA every blue moon, while I find myself taking less and less interest in LiveJournal now.

And the worst of it all is the fact that I’ve developed contact with so many people within such a short time that I’ve worn such contact with them out as well. I think I can make a whole list of them, in fact (listed in order of who’s name I can remember from the top of my head):

Strype
Lance Foxx
Kitnoki
Sunookitsune
Megan
Wakkaookami
T.J.
Skipper
Frankie (aka Iffriel)
Sir Kinsel
Shadee
Cerberus
Blackrat
Phenobarb T. Wolf
Tintoraneko
Vermilion
Husky the Husky
Ghislain
Lethe
Smoh
Foxwithabass
Nauta
Sevron
Kristine
Kaijima
Disubluceo
SetonCello
Wolfstar
urbanFem
Jen

Yeah, them and MANY more.

The sad thing is, I don’t maintain contact with a great deal of these people anymore. I don’t know why, I just wear such contact with them after a short period of time.

So what do I blame this on? What could be the reason for why this has happened?

I blame this on IM. If I hadn’t of come across Instant messaging, and just stuck to other means, like DA’s Private message service (also known as “notes”) or simple email, I wouldn’t have been so stuck on who’s online or available (or neither) everytime I got on.

I realize it now…

In this aspect, I was actually living my internet life from IM window to IM window, trying to have conversations with so many people JUST for the hell of it, and rarely for any other reason. I was contradicting my own reclusive nature after all. I abandoned RL out of frustration with the people I had to deal with IRL, especially the church, and eventually replaced it with the Internet and its multisubverses.

Now I’m not saying that I want to revert to what or who I was before, but now I realize that Instant messaging (IM) is something that I can basically do without.

Realizing this, I’m considering getting rid of my IMs now, what do you all think?

Damn, damn, DAMN!!!

My MSN subscription service has finally cut off today, and the memory on the hard drive has been wasted to nil. So now I’ll have to get a job to get MSN back up and running, as well as delete a lot of files from my hard drive (especially my mp3s).

Damn….

Well, I have community college to look forward to come January.

Last day of school (as far as 2004 is concerned)

Well, its been an embattled 1st semester for me, but I’ve finally seen the end of school as I know it, or have known it since 1st grade.

Beginning next semester, and extending all the way to graduation on May 27, I’ll be doing only three subjects in school (specifically Bible [argh!], Language Arts [let’s just get this thing over with already], and Advanced Math [bleh! and argh!]). And after Advanced Math, I’ll either go to either my job (which I don’t have yet) or Macon State’s Warner Robins campus (I’ll have to choose either before Jan. 10, when school starts back).

Hopefully, I’ll become a transient student at Macon State, since I want to be at least somewhat acculturated in how to live your life around college. Plus, it would look good on my application for one of the colleges in Ontario if I went ahead and took some college courses, don’t you think?

So things are really about to change for teh snowkitteh. But of course, I still have these three weeks of Xmas/New Years to look forward to.

Oh yeah, over these couple of weeks, I’ve realized that people who want to use hypnosis (neuro-linguistic programming) or other mental means to engender a physical transformation in a person are mostly interested in TRANSGENDER transformations, NOT therianthropic.

Bummer….

Up late again

Well, I managed to make it in at the last minute to take the SAT this morning. Hope I did good *crosses fingers*

Other than that, I’ve been at the comp all day, writing stuff, doing stuff, eating stuff, as usual. So nothing unusual today except for the SAT thing.

Also, I’ll try to find the time to actually do that, although I have it all written down upon paper (sorry, I just feel too lazy to do it right now)

And I have so many mp3s on my hard drive that I should become an online radio dj. Now if I only had the money…

Probably start “Tortured Soul Radio”, a gothic online radio station whose music format would follow a time-of-day/seasonal schedule, featuring acoustic, metal, dark country, acid jazz, jazz, industrial, grunge, and other genres, as long as the music can cater to the tortured soul in some way.

Hey, its an idea.

Food Poisoning, a day off of school, and the iceberg

Well, I havent updated this in a long while, so I’ll go ahead and update you all on whats been up with me.

Well, from Monday afternoon until just this morning, I’ve been battling with what I’ve realized to be food poisoning (dun-dun-DUNNNNN!). That’s right, folks, my stomach was in pain almost this entire week, and there was nothing I could do to help my situation except sleep it off (or attempt to, in a FETAL POSITION). Damnit, my stomach was “straight” fucked up, even in class on Wednesday, when the pain was its worst.

On that day, I woke up to get the phone, and I had to run from the bedroom to the den (I stumbled and fell because my leg was asleep and stiff as wood). I picked up the phone to talk to Mom, and all of a sudden, my body feels a painful and disturbing rush of dizzyness; I nearly pass out, and I barely manage to moan into the receiver, since Mom is on the other end going like “I told you to go to bed on time, didn’t I?!”

The entire day drags by uneventfully but slowly, and I want to get home as badly as fucking possible. Then I get home, I curl up in a fetal position (something which I think I could get used to), I wake up a couple of hours later, wearily stumble into the kitchen to get a cup of Campbell’s soup, and I have to immediately go to the bathroom. How about, when I sat down, I didn’t do #1 nor #2, but rather #3?!

Could Wednesday get any worse? Well, I went back to bed before I could find out.

And finally, Mom relents to letting me have Thursday off, since a friend of the family convinced her that it was INDEED something going wrong with my stomach (they’d been having a stomach virus epidemic in what I find to be not only my area. By Thursday’s end, I’m better enough to go back to school on Friday, and after school today, here I am, fucked up, but better than how I was on Wednesday.

Damn I can’t write. Fucking aftereffects.

Anyway, in my period of exile, I’ve managed to read up (for the umpteenth time) on the unconscious and subconscious, and I’ve done my own little re-evaluation of the concept of the human mind as an iceberg. I’ll tell you that on the next post, hopefully.

Have to go right now, since Saturday’s the day of the SAT. Wish me luck, banzai, and whatnot.

*slinks off to bed*

PS: I’ve found that new holiday song to be especially catchy and multiculturally-embracive, lol.

This is going to be the best Christmahanukwanzaka ever! :-3P

My reply to an article I found

http://www.tysknews.com/Depts/Our_Culture/happy_kwanzaa.htm

Here is my reply to the article:

As an American who is of African slave ancestry, I almost see your point when you mention that the philosophical standpoints that are and have been taken by the previous annual celebrations of Kwanzaa are full of idealisms and are lacking in actual substance of legitimacy. I also agree that such standpoints have been taken by the “big men” of post-colonial Africa’s history as mere slogans, but very much to the disadvantage of their respective citizens’ human and individual rights.

However, I must say that such similarities end there. In your article, you have ignored many facts that were in need of your prior consideration before such a demagogy were directed against a cultural celebration of the likes of Kwanzaa.

First off, as you had criticized the “tribal” concept of collective work, and contrasted it so much against the specialization and division of labor, you must have forgotten that it was through the same system (the one which you had praised for its ensuring of the prosperity of the Western world for the past 200 years) that the many slave trades occurred, particularly the Transatlantic Slave Trade (TAST). Such slave trades, if you understand, were not only the processes through which human capital and potential (economic-wise) were systematically drained from an already environmentally-disadvantaged sub-Saharan Africa, but were the same that put sub-Saharan Africa on such a standing as is considered stereotypical of that same region today. I’m sure that those chiefs who sold their POWs to European slave traders had some sort of good grasp of “specialization and division of labor”…

So is the so-called “tribal” concept working for sub-Saharan Africa? Not at the least. But has the imposition of free-market economies worked in post-Cold-War Africa? Not at any rate whatsoever (look at Bolivia in South America and see what happened). And furthermore, from what I’ve read, the “collective”, “cooperative” approach toward economics that has been espoused by Maulana Karenga is not necessarily the kind as was espoused by Karl Marx or Mao Tse-Tung, but rather the kind that has been espoused by those families who’re of West Indian and African ancestry (particularly those who are first-generation immigrants to the United States) in order to fund their fledgling family-owned businesses (and strangely enough, the same kind that is used by East Indian and East Asian families [again, especially those who are first-generation immigrants to America] for the starting-up of their convenience store businesses). It involves the pouring in of capital by family members and friends into the founding and financial maintenance of such businesses, and sometimes, even the collective ownership of these businesses by family and community members.

And I must strongly object to your verbal slamming of Kwanzaa as a combination of Jewish and Christian (and may I add, Muslim) rites, rituals, and symbols with “pagan” rites. HOW DARE YOU.

How dare you call a legitimate set of spiritual beliefs “pagan”, as if they are abhorrent and pre/under-civilized. I doubt that you’re at any point of advantage to denounce another people’s way of life in that manner; I doubt that you’re even of African ancestry, unless you can prove me otherwise. If you don’t have any experience in the field, then you can’t talk as if you do, and Heaven forbid that you can lay your mouth on it, so to speak. I take it that you are Christian in your religious beliefs (prove me otherwise if necessary), so you can criticize your own religion, its theology, and those who adhere to it, but can you say the same concerning Islam and its theology? Can you say the same concerning Judaism? Hinduism? Not unless you have been an adherent of either religions within your own lifetime. Thus, to call the religious beliefs of a people “pagan” (that is to say, “pre-” or “uncivilized”) without being an adherent of that same spirituality robs your argument of all scholastic legitimacy. And furthermore, such “pagan” beliefs were the beliefs of my own ancestors, so such a statement as you have made in your article regarding my ancestors’ way of life are personally INSULTING to me and my family, not to forget my people. I doubt that you would find it amusing if I were to lower myself to your level in that manner, so I will not do such in this written reply.

Also, as you praise “the Western tradition of private property, personal freedoms, and the rule of law”, you tend to forget that private property didn’t exist in Black Africa until it was introduced by the Asiatics (Middle Easterners) and Europeans; to traditional sub-Saharan Africa, the land belonged to all, and was not owned by any particular person, not even the chief or head of the people, but any division of land among families or individuals were regarded as leases, not permanent ownerships.

And as for personal freedoms and the rule of law, such was already in force long before the Europeans and Middle Easterners. The people who have violated such are truly evil men, especially in the eyes of their own people. But those are individuals, not an entire group of people, and the people who desire and have desired for democratic change in their political, social, and economic lifestyle have struggled, continue to struggle, and have accomplished their strivings for such; so to say that sub-Saharan Africa does not have any sense of democracy (which I take it from you to mean “human/civil rights”) is totally devoid of legitimacy and truth.

And finally, do you have an alternative? Do you have a substitute for Kwanzaa, one which would espouse your just-as-potentially-abhorrent Western values instead of our “backward”, “degraded” ancestors lifestyle? Throughout your criticism, no speck of a solution is found, so what is your point? Are you saying that African-Americans should only stick to holidays which are of American or European origin, as those are the only holidays, celebrations, or festivities which “should” naturally be acceptable to Afro-Americans? Then I must wholeheartedly disagree, as I could use the same argument against those same cultural celebrations, and against you as well.

But if that was the point, and if you couldn’t provide an alternative celebration of some kind which celebrates African tradition and both African and Afro-Diasporian history, then I eventually fail to see the legitimacy of your critique, and, because you have failed to fully enlighten me, and I doubt most other people, you have ultimately and scholastically failed in your attempt to discredit Kwanzaa as a celebration of culture, history, and the importance of family and community.

I reiterate, you have failed.

Have a nice day.

Sincerely,

Harry C.D. Underwood
age 17, high school senior and graduating valedictorian, Warner Robins