Category Archives: Uncategorized

An interesting site

http://library.thinkquest.org/22845/kush/index.shtml

The Kingdom of Kush/Nubia/whatever. Ive realized something while poring over maps of both Egypt and the Sudan. But Im going to talk about it at one of the cmomunities for black africans at lj. join me?

And also, Im gonna buy that book “The Destruction of Black Civilization” by Chancellor Williams, or at least order it, since B. Dalton at the Macon Mall doesnt have it in stock. Itll be $16.95 to order it, and an extra 4 bucks to have it delivered in the mail. So since I rarely spend money, I think that this would be a good time to get something that Ive always wanted to possess rather than borrow from the library.

Besides, its a powerful and influential cult classic.

From animefreak40k:

“y’know….considering that you have stopped by my page a couple of times and left your words of wisdom, i just had to stop and see just whats going on over here.

now, the first thing i check for is a DevID (why? i curiouslly nosey like that)….and i must say that for one so young (no offense mind you) you seem to be quite leared and well…..uncorrupted i guess. i really cant put my finger on it, but it just seems that youre more open-minded and thoughtful than many folks twice your age….and good god knows how many that are your age.

you have vast potential to go far in this world my friend, keep your head up and your eyes open”

animefreak40k posted this some time ago on my userpage at DA. Very inspiring words, I appreciate them.

We talked alot about politics, the Apocalypse, and stuff like that through DA PMing, and, by debating, we’ve learned things we didnt expect to find out. Very cool army guy. Maybe not all Army guys are patriotic hardasses (like my sister *snort!*)

I love being an Aquarius! 😀

Subliminal messages

Originally posted here. 

I remember watching an episode of “Conspiracies” on TechTV that was dealing with conspiracies concerning the mind, like mind control and brain implants. However, one thing has stayed with me since then: subliminal messages.

Subliminal messages are messages that are transmitted subconsciously (and clandestinely) through different mediums, although our senses are unable to detect them or their transmission (unless those who are responsible for their transmission are put under scrutiny and investigation of the most strenuous kinds).

Such messages have been alleged to have been transmitted through tv commercials and radio pop music hits, and if so, are most likely to say such things as “buy this product”, “buy my album”, or even “my sweet satan”.

But exactly why would they transmit these types of messages in the mediums of pop culture, like tv, radio, or maybe the internet?

The purpose of subliminal messages is for whoever the transmitter is to intoxicate the senses with media fodder in order to bypass them and etch a message of some kind into the subconscious. In this way, even although your senses may lead you to a repugnant attitude toward that particular medium’s fodder, a message has been communicated to the subconscious, a message that may be telling you to buy this album or product, and you’ll be surprised to find yourself at the store, buying that product, not long after! :lol:

So, now that Ive explained subliminal messages in the best way I could, I now come to a conclusion: As subliminal messages are meant to bypass the senses to write a somewhat penetrating message into your mind, wouldnt it be possible for subliminal messages to combine with the whole therianthropy/tf/anthro/furry thing?

My thing is, for us who have trouble with m-shifting, as if p-shifting was an unreachable goal already, wouldnt it help if subliminal messages could write something into our subconscious, like “you are not human. you know this. you are turning into a horse. you are growing a muzzle….” and so on?

Because think about it: if you read that message just now, didnt it sound a little, well, off? If so, then imagine if your senses didnt detect anything off about it? Basically, when something is fed into your subconscious, it becomes a piece of reality, truth, or fact for you, or at least it should….

I think that such messages, if given full effect, would change the way we sense and perceive things that are familiar to us. Even things that we imagine or wish could be more than mere imagination or wishing if they penetrated into and infiltrated our subconscious.

What do you guys think?

Last night? im such a night owl…

Well, right now, Ive been up for a very unhealthily long time, perusing my comp for, well, I cant tell you guys since its very embarrassing @.@

My army sis is here until Sunday on r&r, so its a good get-together time for her, her husband, and her two boys. Today we all drove to Fort Benning, where she wants to be stationed when she thinks that she’ll be permanently out of Iraq next year, prolly January. She’s objected to my strong urge to move north to either MN or ON, and she offered to let me stay with them when they move to Fort Benning next year.

After seeing a tour of the post (air force: base; army: post), I was like, hell no Im not moving to the boonies! Warner Robins/Robins AFB is better than this, dammit!

So yeah, NOW Im totally resolute on moving north, no question in that.

Now Im still wondering about whether MN or ON to move to for college/bachelor/after-high-school living.

I would want to move to ON because its another country, another flag, and, well, I just like Canada, even though Ive never been there!

But at the same time, Im still pondering on MN. Why? Because Ive come into more contact with friends through DA and IM and other stuff. Nauta, MJ, and Sev all live in the Minneapolis vicinity, and theyre great people to be around.

And the fact that Sev is finally certain on getting a residence by next spring so that we two can be roommates is giving more to the Minnesota option. Nauta told me that things will get better for all four of us by next year, so I hope on that myself. Meanwhile, for the rest of this year, my options with regards to MN and ON remain open. So I might end up with Sev (as roommate), Nauta, and MJ, or I might be neighbors with Strype, by this time next year.

Strange though. Nauta is 23, Sev is 19 (i think), MJ is 18, and Im, well, 17. And furthermore, as I dont have MSNIM, YIM, or ICQ with me right now, thanx to my older sis (not the one who’s in the army) screwing with my comp, I can only use AIM at the moment. Is that telling me something? That I sould turn my eyes toward Minnesota, since Nauta, Sev, and MJ use AIM regularly? I dont know…..

Sweeeeet! @.@; Im going to bed.

Im back. well……*sigh*

I just got into the door on Friday, and Im back in Warner Robins.

*sigh*

This is the first time that Ive seen dsl, or have felt at home this good, or anything like that since I left for STL slightly less than a month ago.

Not saying that all of it’s roses….

Come to find out that my oldest sister, who comes by often, decided to screw with my comp; now Im just pissed as hell that she took off my MSN service, which was doing fine with another dsl service to add, and she fucked it up so damn bad that I can no longer use ICQ, MSNIM, or YIM. And to add insult to injury, whatever she did to it, I cant download anything anymore.

AAARRRRGGGHHH!!!!

but at least, i have dsl, and i dont have dad to look behind my back and bitch about how much I use the comp.

oh yeah, my younger sis is here for the next 9 days or so, on r&r from iraq, which is a good thing, i guess.

so im hoping that things get back to normal for me before school starts.

oh, and one more thing: the school which i despise so much decided that, if i come back to there for my senior year, ill be able to have

1) an earlier graduation than is offered to other students

2) shorter school days

3) no grad test

So i think ill try the school one more time. ill risk religious dialogue being shoved down my throat one last time. then its vamoose to high school for me; hello bachelor life, or college dorm!

Its been a while…

Ive been up here for nearly two weeks now, and I havent been online for a long while, but now I hope to be on here alot more, now that Dad’s basically done with his hasty connection talk. His comp is sucky, and he has dialup. Plus, I have to ride with him everyday all over Missouri and both central and southern Illinois in his semi. By now I hate it, but I hope to have more to do in STL once Dad’s let up on me. He’s been talking on and on and on since I arrived at his house, but I guess he cant help it, considering his persnoality, and the fact that we havent been together under the same roof since 1993, when he and Mom divorced. So he’s making an attempt to connect with me before I become a senior in August.

Im also a very giddy snowkitty because this coming Tuesday, I get to go to the Furmeet at Mokabe’s Coffee House on Arsenal St., where Ill be able to come into contact with the furry fandom IRL. Ive already talked to Tyger Cowboy, who is going to the furmeet as well, so Im like, very, very edgy.

Also, I discovered coffee back on Sunday at the Galleria. I ran into the Starbucks there, and I thought about how my Dad’s wife, Almaz, makes her own coffee for guests (she’s from Addis Ababa). So I was like, what the hell, and I asked the guy at the counter about coffee. He showed me a sample cup of Verona brew, which didnt taste that good, although it perked up when I added ALOT of sugar and whole milk to it. So the guy suggested that I try a cup of Vanilla latte with whipped cream, and when I tasted it, I was like, damn! This stuff is good! Ive been asking Dad if I can get another cup of Vanilla latte ever since. 😀

Oh yeah, we’re going to the Wallflowers concert for the 4th of July, although Im not celebrating (Dad’s taking the instruments and other stuff to the place theyre performing at).

But, except for that, its been a boring two weeks in STL.

*yawn* Im going to bed.

back to my journal

kickstarting back my journal.

well, its 10:47 (48…49…) in the morning, and im waiting at home by myself, and we’re leaving warner robins for st louis tonight.

oh yeah, you may notice that i havent updated here in a llllooooonnngggg while, since ive been busy being a busy snowleopard around LJ. in fact, i also did my first fanfic of sorts at DA. so far, no one’s commented on it ;_;, so im like, screw it anyway.

ive also looked at LJ for any forums talking about “black” people. in fact, i joined to express how i felt about black people and their culture of stupidity and ignorance. you’d prolly be offended by my comments there.

i joined since, of course, im not an artist type of fur like alot of my friends are, and i have yet to write a fur story (ill try it out soon, though!), but most of all i joined it because im simply an odd type of person ^w^

i also started and , in case you guys are interested in looking over there. im prolly going to leave them alone and see how they are in, say, a few months.

and plus, ive gotten interested in rock music from japan and mexico. The Pillows in Japan, and Molotov, Kinky, and Cafe Tacuba in Mexico, these bands are tight as hell!

I wonder if they have any bands like them in, say, South Africa? hmmm….

anyway, ill try to update more on this journal.

ooh, i also got my own furry code! its on my user info thingie, so if you know anything about whatever the hell a furry code is and does, please tell me. the main, if not only reason why i got one was because theyre so common among furs.

*yawn* im going back to bed…

What Lies Beneath

Originally posted here.

I realized something some time ago.

We have individual lives to live, yes?

And day by day we show ourselves as one thing, a persona that is made for the outside world. I show myself as a 17 year old who is addicted to looking at fur art, expresses himself through his writing and, once in a while, tries his hand at doing his own art.

But when we get home, when we go into our showers, lock ourselves into our bedrooms, putting ourselves away from the outside world, we are another person.

A person that lets out so many other things and secrets about him-or-herself that most others in either or both the RL or online dont know about, and, unless they are thoroughly prepared, shouldnt know at all or at least the time being.

Those secrets about ourselves that we cant show to the outside world lest we fall apart.

Such secrets are the things that make us who we are, the base for our existence. These secrets, these hidden truths are the things that undercurrently drive us in either or both our RL and online lives. If such secrets were revealed in a way that we couldnt prepare ourselves for accepting, we’d be totally screwed.

What are these secrets which we hold so dear?

They are innumerable, but I can make a few suggestions.

Secrets about how we conduct our lives with the people we know only by the fact that we talk to them online, but may never meet them in our lifetime. Several of us keep that from the RL world outside of our bedroom or basement.

Secrets about how we are forced to conduct our lives in the RL public, which we, for the most part, keep from our online peers, unless its going to affect our online lives in any possible way.

Secrets about our lives in the bedroom, or the bathroom, or the office, which we would never think of talking about unless that friend of ours respects us and our conversation enough to earn our trust within that area.

Secrets about how much we’ve been hurt by the things that have occured in our lives, such as rape by a male relative, or finding out that we messed around and got a case of STD.

Secrets about our fantasies and desires, some of which are most deviant and off-the-wall, so much so that we cant tell them to anyone, even if we tried.

So yeah, we have such inner fantasies, secrets, desires, hidden things.

Then, in that case, i wonder how the people around me, RL or online, live their lives when not interacting with me? Hmm, one can only wonder about…

WHAT LIES BENEATH….

Last Day of School – A Tribute

Im writing this essay, the first Ive had in a while. Lately Ive been concentrating on other things, and I have even tried to submit art. But Ive worn myself out easily by drawing my own pics, as I still have had other things to worry about. Such as school.

But starting today, my hiatus (concerning my art) may be over. My years at the private school I go to in Warner Robins, Georgia, have most likely, most hopefully, come to an end on this day. Today was the last day of school, the last day of my 11th grade year.

Ive had ups, Ive had downs, deep downs.

But for all its worth, its not a school year to think about like “oh, all the good times we had.” No…Its simply a year to remember.

Cue the music (Coldplay- “the Scientist”)

If the memories of the school year are a journey for me, I would want 4 people, and only 4 people, to walk with me.

Almayna Chen

Michael Lee

Aaron Glasper

Takiya Patrick

These 4 people were not just my friends, my teachers (except for Aaron, we were “homies”); they were the people who had the most influence on my life for that school year. They were the ones who listened to me and could carry on an intelligent conversation with me. They kept me from doing shit that I could have regretted in the long run.

They kept me alive, really.

Mrs. Patrick, most of all; she was my favorite teacher in my whole life. I never had a reason to be bitter towards her, like I was with most of the other teachers. She understood me, and pushed me in ways that I could understand in BOTH the short and the long run.

When she died, at around 9:00 am in the morning, March 29, 2004, my life was nearly shattered into broken glass. Both mines and Aaron’s; he never had beef with her either.

To the two of us, she was the true definition of sincerety and serenity. Put her name as a definition under the word “Christian” in the dictionary, for she respected people’s beliefs, no matter how different they were from her’s.

Mr. Lee was immediately put in her place, even though he wasnt really qualified as a teacher. As a man who had just retired from the Air Force, Mr. Lee was nonetheless a very sincere and knowledgeable permanent substitute. At first I was sorta at odds with him because of my attitude like “forget America, Im going to Canada” stance, but then I was able to carry on such intelligent conversations as I had with Mrs. Patrick.

He even told me some pretty strange stuff. Like for instance, who would’ve thought that Saddam is a FreeMason?!

OK, tell me more about that later.

And by the way, both with Mrs Patrick and Mr. Lee, our class always had the most disturbingly candid discussions, about such subjects as the kinkiest forms of sex, the stupidest career moves by people in the news, and our own homeroom teacher, Mrs. Brown (she was a wigged and cocky asshole of a teacher to the most of us. Even my Mom got pissed at her! NYYAARRGGHH!!! HATE YOU, MRS. BROWN MOTHERFUCKER!!! DIE SHE-FUCKING-DEVIL!!! *stabs with a pitchfork and gets holy water*). Heh I always wanted to do and say that to Mrs. Brown (BEEYOTCH!!!).

Now Mrs. Chen (she doesnt have Chinese descent, her husband just happens to be of part-Chinese-Jamaican descent) was a very sincere person. She couldnt take noise, she just wasnt that kind of person. And she often yelled at me and everyone else because either it was too frickin loud in the classroom (half a large trailer, you all!) or I wasnt doing my work on the computer (computer was her cup of tea, she was just forced into being a science teacher, which is one of the main reasons why she isnt coming back next year).

But whenever me and her carried on an intelligent conversation (behind closed doors, of course!), she told me about her really serious issues concerning the school, and she was honest and straightforward about it. She told me alot of things yesterday that at first I was blown away by, but then I realized that from, her position, all of what she was saying, about the students who gave her the most shit, was actually TRUE. And alot of those same class”mates” also put me through alot of shit too, and I was immediately enlightened. And understand that this was her FIRST year at the school, I think it was her first year teaching PERIOD, just like Mrs Patrick. She’ll be sorely missed by me.

Now Aaron, oh boy! Aaron is around my age, and he was held back a year, and he was often considered the class clown by everyone else. And yes, he had a sense of humor that made the year a little better than it would have been if he werent at the school. He came in the middle of last school year, and he didnt change himself for anyone ever since.

His hero was none other than Tupac Amaru Shakur, and he admired his multifacetedness as a rapper (Aaron has all of Shakur’s CD’s), a poet (“In The Event of my Demise”), a dancer (for Digital Underground), an actor (Poetic Justice and Juice). Aaron showed a taste, if not a lust, for the thug life, as he himself was part of FOLKs, a gang that you might know of if you live in inner-city New York.

He also showed a side to me that he really didnt show to but a few others. He showed his knowledgeable side, his intelligent side.

I was shocked when he asked me this koen: “Did God ever make a rock so big that he couldnt pick it up himself?” I say both Yes and No, and either time he responded “Then He’s not the Almighty.”

Aaron encouraged me to not change myself for these assholes at the private religious school I went to. And in the end, I never did. He stood by me the WHOLE time. Never had an argument with him, never was angry with him for any least thing. Just like with Mrs Patrick.

These are the only four people that Ill remember (and WANT TO) from this school year. These are the four whom Ill miss most dearly, with all of my heart.

And as I go for one last time from the school that I was forced to call my school for the last 5 years, I want to say this to them:

“You 4 were the people for whom I had the most respect, admiration, and love. I doubt that Ill be coming back, and i seriously doubt that either of you will be at this school next year. But know this: Im glad that, out of the five years I spent at this school, you 4 are, and will always be, the only things I would want to remember about that period in my life. No one else matters in my memory of these 5 years, and I dont want them to, either. I wish the best for you 4, and if I dont see you again, I hope to see you in the next life. But then again, the world needs more people like you, so I wont have to worry about that! :) ”

Cue the music (Whitney Houston- “I Will Always Love You”)

Yo

Ive been around for awhile. Im just taking a break from DA for a while, since I have other things to worry about right now. Im going with Dad to st Louis, and he’s coming down to Georgia to pick me up the weekend after Memorial Day; school’s out on Wednesday; Im working on two clubs I just started: KiSwahili Nation and Big Cat Anthro Club.

Ive also downloaded the first 10 episodes of Naruto, and now Im hooked. If you dont have Bittorrent, download it now.. Then if you do have it, go to Suprnova’s anime site to find Naruto anime, and then download what you want from there. Takes about slightly less than 24 hours to download 5 full episodes.

And also, I just found this story that you might be interested in. Its such a beautiful story, i cried when I read the first half of it, seriously. No Im not gay (although since I do get automatically turned on by looking at both anthro studs and anthro vixens doing their yiffing, I can consider myself bisexual), but i think this story would make for a good read. Besides, the poor soul in the story gets turned into a snow leopard kid. Mrrowwwlll….